I've been following this story closely these past few weeks with a heavy heart. A few weeks ago, Za'layia was jumping rope with a police officer and she asked the officer to keep her safe. And the officer couldn't. Her family couldn't. It all happened so quickly.
I can only imagine what Destiny, Za'layia's mama, is feeling today. But I do know this: I know that she loves that little girl. I know that she wanted to protect her from being hurt.
Destiny made a statement to the press and addressed the person responsible for her daughter's death, saying "I just want whoever did this to my baby to know I don't hate you for what you did. I just need you to turn yourself in. I need justice for my baby."
In that moment, she showed a capacity for reconciliation and compassion that simply astounded me. In the midst of her own grief, she spoke to that person without a trace of rage or contempt. I don't know if I'd have enough compassion in my heart to even speak the name of the person who took my daughter away. But Destiny--you did. Your compassion moved me deeply.
Destiny, I am sorry for the loss of your baby. She is a beautiful, precious child. We in Milwaukee hold the story of Za'layia in careful hands. We hope the person responsible steps forward so there can be justice for you & your child. We hope that grief will not spill over into violence, fear, or indifference but into greater reconciliation with each other. I hope to be a person with an extraordinary capacity for compassion toward others--a person like you. I learned that from you this week, Destiny.
And I am deeply sorry for the price paid for this lesson.
Hey guys. You know what's cool about writing stuff and publishing it to the world wide web? Well, first it's pretty great that about a couple dozen people read it (thanks, Relatives!) and a handful non-relateds read it too.
Meet some of the non-relateds, Anna & Kole and their little kiddos, Atticus & Sophia. Let's all do a collective sigh over this beautiful family, shall we? And they're just as kind & cool as they are good-looking.
We gathered our families together over dessert and tea & Anna asked if I'd be willing to give her some input & ideas for her home.
Anna & the fam live in a Victorian across town. One little factoid about me is that I love Victorian homes. They're so stately with their high ceilings, tall windows, beautiful moldings & trim work and man--all that natural light flooding the rooms is just amazing.
Anna's dining room is the first room you walk into off the front entrance. It has three gorgeous tall windows, fresh paint, a pretty chandelier, neutral wood floor, crisp woodwork and a newly installed wainscot wall. She's also got a perfectly-scaled table and chairs in the room, a skinny console table against the wall and a piece of artwork (shown below) that she is trying out.
The dining room already has so much going for it. High five, Anna.
Anna really digs Emily Henderson's style, particularly her use of oil paintings & vintage finds but also appreciates a the occasional splash of Amber Lewis' bohemian vibe. In other words, Anna & I are style besties.
We talked through mirror & art options/placement & furniture. There's a couple special considerations about Anna's dining room:
-it's the first room a guest walks into and it should feel inviting, not cramped
-she has two little kiddos & some storage needs
-table is multi-functional for art projects, homework, etc.
-there's not a lot of walking room around the table, so any furniture needs a very slim profile
-Anna has a console table in the dining room already, but it doesn't add any storage and
the base doesn't allow for baskets to easily tuck underneath
Here's a couple interesting design quandaries that I wrestled with:
-is it weird to have oil paintings/framed photography of people you don't know? (Maybe-
depends on if I feel connected to the work).
-would I want to look at myself in a mirror while slurping spaghetti at dinner? (No, unless I am
having a really great hair day).
-would I want to hang a mirror on the wall to reflect light from the windows, even if it's too
high to use as a functional mirror? (Maybe).
-should a floor mirror be used as a glorious statement piece even through it wouldn't add any
storage to the room? (Hmmm....)
The practical side of me won out in this situation. I nixed the glorious floor mirror idea because it takes up too space without adding storage. I added a rug with a banded border to add the cozy factor and offset it from the wood floor. I sourced some vintage oil paintings and found a couple console table options that have a slim profile and add storage.
Here's plan A. The mirror's grid adds interest and some curves to a room with mostly straight angles. The brass finish on the sconces, console hardware and mirror add that collected, vintage vibe. And the artwork remind me of Anna & her family. And that bust vase is entirely non-functional, but I like the bit of funk it adds, like a really fancy chia pet.
In Plan B, I switched out the mirror & console options. This console adds storage and ties into the reclaimed vibe of the dining table. The mirror above is fresh and crisp enough to keep the room from feeling too old: